Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

"She is the ice queen, a cold-blooded b*tch." I never denied the title, neither have I claimed that I am a saint. I am human, just like everyone else--fallen. Evil is embedded in our very nature. It is just the choices made in our conscious and reasonable mind that curbs pandemonium to be unleashed.

Many consider that I am a tough nut, an iron lady, and that I rise up to the challenge, overcome, and conquer what is in my path. Situations and circumstances of my past have nurtured me to be strong. But seriously, how strong do I need to be? As life dishes out its realities, in a sadistic way, I have developed an almost impenetrable defense mechanism, a wall built with harsh rule to protect myself and others who I care for from being hurt.

Being impulsive, short-tempered, and stubborn is no help at all. My tongue and mind are sharp, and I can cause serious hurt and damage to the heart of the soul. I constantly have to practice self-control, for this side of me is manipulative, conniving, and mean. I have restraint to avoid acting like such to get what I want, but I may not able to suppress myself when I choose to be mean for the sake of hurting. Maturity might just be what people see from the lighted side.

For convenience sake and easy housekeeping, I would rather throw all of my problems and everything that is associated with them out of the window; however, my masochistic side bids me to shelf them instead. I just brought an item down, ripped open the can of malicious, mutated worms, and let them feast off a soul. Can time dissolve and dilute a hurt? Not in my kitchen. It simply brews and stews. It would be sheer luck if I had made my peace and thrown out the shelfed item, but like every malicious woman, I have my magic and my potions.

Don't say that you are sorry. You have made your choice. Suck it up and deal with it. Knowing light, I was humane and warned you of the consequences. You accepted the rules, and I was fair. No, actually I allowed you to have the better share of the bargain. In fact, I had cheered for you, fend for you, and even protected you. I am able to take care of myself. I needed you to take care of yourself.

Hell has no fury like a woman scorned. 2 years? 10 years? I am just a simple girl, longing for the basic needs. The complexities you see is a part of me, that cannot be changed, for then I will be less me. It is a fair offer extended to all:
Accept me for who I am. Discount nothing. Have some decency to return the courtesy, for I accept you just as you are.