Date, Dates, and Dating...

I think I have contextualized my understanding and application of the word "date" that to me, it carries a lighter connotation to the popular meaning. I would approach a date as an outing of two individuals hanging out, catching up, getting to know each other. It is also an appointment made to meet another half. Therefore, I have been on dates with almost everyone who I know from family members to buddies, from guy friends to a close female teacher. It has become a notion that I casually overuse, and of the recent months I find the need to redefine this vocabulary in order not to embarrass myself or come across rude to the other party.

My general understanding of the word date is for two individuals, generally of the opposite gender, to get to know each other better through activities shared the day. I enjoy going out with my guy friends alone, even though I know that we are nothing more but close friends, just to catch up and find out things that I seem to overlook on a daily basis. I have guy friends who are just shy, and going out on a date with them gives them exposure on what it would be like on a real date in the future. (You know, it is like practicing how to act and speak with girls. However, sometimes I am too much a buddy that they fail to see me as just a girl. This would then put the outlook of our outing on the fence.) I use the same word when I spend time with my gal pals too; simply because it sounds nice.

Now, I have reached a point in my life where the people who asks me out on dates do not share the closeness of the aforementioned. As mere acquaintances attracted by physical appearance and first impressions, it is hardly likely that we can casually enjoy the evening without contemplating the intentions of the other half. These guys randomly come from people I met through business connections or someone who I randomly come across. How then should I carry myself through a date? What should my approach about the event be? Should the invitation of "We should go out on a date sometime..." be taken seriously--that the guy likes my character thus far, would like to find out more whether we match, and events that follow might lead to a beginning of a different relationship?

The popular understanding of a date is not just a mere appointment to meet at a specific time, but it is considered especially as a social engagement between two persons that often has a romantic character. This means that I have every right to expect the guy to be a gentleman, and bear the responsibility to behave and look like a lady, in the context that we are gathering more information through the shared activity to explore the possibilities of a deeper relationship. It is also opportunities for either party to score brownie points in giving the right (honest and truthful) impression of character and personality to the other. So, I guess I can remain old-school in this area and allow him to show me a good time in his taste.

Does "romantic" as an adjective to the event, then, mean candlelight dinners, visiting couple spots, or participating in events that would sweep one off her feet? Again the popular understanding and expectation of the word would refer to items or events marked by expressions of love or affection, and possibly conducive to or suitable for lovemaking. Here, I would reserve the idea only to my dates who I specifically have interests in. Nevertheless, I would appreciate it if my dates are all romantic in the sense that they are responsive to the appeal of what is idealized, heroic, or adventurous. I find nothing more attractive than a guy who has a passion for life, a strong hold on his ideals and principles, and yet comfortable to explore the beyond in the sharing of thoughts and philosophies. (Dreamy sigh...)

So, I guess with all that was mentioned, I should just keep things simple and be a girl when I guy does ask me out. This means I will try to expect less of my ideal and leave the door open for the possibility of something romantic to happen between us. I can hear vividly my guy friends in my head telling me to give the guy a chance without scrutinizing him in every manner, and my gal pals asking me to be more like a girl enjoying come what may rather than taking the direct approach of merely hanging out with the guy and trying to be his buddy.