Birthday Reflections

Birthdays are never a big thing for me. I guess I have conditioned myself not to make a big deal out of it. It is not because I think THAT less of myself, but I guess I just think that if I do mean something to some, they could treat me special everyday if they wanted. My birthday is just like every other day. For me, I just spend the day thinking about life, just like every other day, maybe more than any other day. I do enjoy spending time with those who really care about my journey of life.

LIFE came crashing at me. It is challenging. It comes with my pursuit of my passion, and thus even with all my whining, I will overcome and demand nothing but success. At this moment, I just wish that I have been training myself hard to deal with everything. It is not impossible, I am just tired and need more organization.

I was really stressed out Monday night after I left ESL Methods. My pile of coursework just mutated into a beast that takes pleasure in drowning my soul. It is not all bad, just a little too overwhelming as the time I wish to have to complete them is a luxury I do not have. Waves of emotions came crashing upon me. I miss having those who work magic on my rainy days around me. I retreated to a long hot bath and cookie making to cheer myself up.

Putting emotions to work is probably the best thing for me in times like such. Colleen asked me to proofread a very important letter of recommendation for the appointment of full professorship of a professor whom we both adore. The 2.5 hours spent on it brought back memories of translating paperwork at TCU, I get to see what a smart student's writing is like and compare it to mine, and I finally KNOW that my writing is not bad at all.

At midnight, B and Nemma came jumping out from the bedroom and scream-sang "Happy Birthday" at the top of their lungs. (It was a big thing as these two are the most mellow and passive people apart from me. That little activity possibly shortened another few years of Nem's life. It meant a lot.)

Today was just another full day of work and homework was the only thing on my mind. I did take my morning slow and reported in for work slightly past 11 bring Jamba Juice for my favorite Financial Aid people. They gave me a surprise of Dunkin Donuts and my 2nd b-day song. It was nice. I hid there for the rest of the day and took off slightly early for a date with my homework. While making dinner, Macchan called!!! Maaaa-bin called me and we caught up. Man! I missed that guy! We reminisced about the fun birthdays we shared to share.

I made dinner for myself and Nem, then brought it to her at the library. I made it back for HOUSE but was certainly not in the mood for homework anymore. The build up of annoyance just put me in the driving mood and I steered Colleen and B out the door for a drive. We drove around to the normal places we go and chilled at Dunkin Donut to wait for Nem to get off work. We picked her up at 11 and went to Denny's for more food.

There is no big deal about my birthday. I was hoping some people to ring me up or something, but I had fun replying the many Facebook messages received. Thanks, guys. Your prayers will sustain my day, semester, and year.