Would You Smile for Me?

君の笑顔が私の支え　(^－^)　私の笑顔　(＊^－^＊)　があなたの支えになるなれば

ずっと笑っていたいな～

"All men are heartless" often is released during my outburst of frustration towards matters relating to the other gender and relationships. Guys who know me long enough do hear this every now and then, especially of recent years. I have a fair share of encounters and experiences with the male kind in family ties, friendships, and relationships to know enough to make such a claim that I often get away with it. Nevertheless someone countered my statement with "And all women are crazy," to which I thought it was a fair comment made tactfully.

It drives me up the wall when guys do not comprehend what is going on in dealing with the opposite sex. I am often left dumbfounded on how dense a guy can get when in comes to interpreting signals given by a girl. It is almost obvious to everyone around them that she obviously likes him, but it seems like he will eventually end up to be the last person to know. Does she actually have to make a distinct move before he gets the idea? How long would it take a guy to understand what she likes, prefers, and wants? When only will she be able to get a response from him?

Being the impatient and stubborn person I am, it is absolutely annoying and makes me want to tear my hair out when they show indifference to a situation where I have made a move. I have grown up with guys and I understand them well enough to give them space and save them face. However, with such a background, I do have a rather high/boyish ego myself. For me to actually make a move do put me in a compromised spot, exposing my Achilles heel. So, if I have taken a step down, why can't you give me an answer? If it is positive, we would all be happy and progress forward; if it is negative, we deal with it and move on; but leaving it as it is with no signs of interest or concern, ARGH!!!

Well, maybe I am hoping and expecting too much, and perhaps my perceptions were deluded by fairy tales and the popular approach of romance. You can not deny that most women are not like such, and thus, yeah, I guess we are crazy. All the effort we put into showing a guy we are interested might often be regarded as nonsensical actions, and when we go berserk treated like such, men might just say the wrong thing for the moment, shrug their shoulders, and scratch their heads. Even though I do not favorite lesbianism, but I can understand why some women would actually take up that option.

There are sensitive guys out there who are nothing but sweet most of the time. However, I agree with the fact that women are crazy when men who go overboard in revealing their softer side are called sissies and pansies by females. Seems like a guys will never be able to win an argument relating to such issues, right?

I believe men should be men, macho to the right degree, firm, a little boyish, wise, mature, and strong to protect the weaker gender. I love open conversations with touches of good humor. Little disagreements and small spits or fights are welcomed as we can be honest and understand each other better. All I want is a response and not feel like I am hitting a void. You can hold up your strong firm front, but at least, let me know that you have some sort of feeling inside.

Heartless as they may seem, I am still not giving up on trying as there is always that small ray of light that I am getting through to them. They maybe mean and heartless, but when the tiniest notion of their cold front is broken down by a sweet gesture, a spoken word, or a smile to themselves is good enough as a starter. I am over the moon when I know a guy treats me special than how he treats other girls. So, I can not really whine and b*tch too much about the matter as funny enough, I guess that is the dance in beginning a new relationship.

Hmm, maybe there IS a lot that I still do not know or understand.